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Dear Metro: "I fell out with a friend, how do I make this right?"

Robinson is back as our guest advice columnist

Dear Metro: I fell out with a friend, how do I make this right?

Feb 26, 2020 Society

This week, Dear Metro is being guest written by Robinson, a New Zealand singer-songwriter who after living in London for most of 2019, is back home in New Zealand to celebrate the release of her debut EP Watching You

In March, Robinson will head on her first-ever headline tour in Australia/New Zealand – including a set at Homegrown Music Festival on Saturday March 21st.

Read last week’s Dear Metro, which was Robinson’s debut as our guest columnist.

Dear Robinson,

I feel very sad about the state of the world all the time, and I don’t know what to do. I’m worried that engaging too much, by reading the news and stuff, is making me angry and unhappy – but I don’t want to be ignorant. What should I do?

From,
Weight of the World

Hi there!

I understand this can be a very uncomfortable feeling wanting to care, staying aware of the state of the world and fighting for our planet but it can become very easy to only be reading and hearing about all the negative things that are happening and I think if this is all we see on TV, or in the papers – it’s only natural we’d feel upset.

It’s about balance. There’s a lot of hurt in the world right now, but there’s a lot of beauty too. Although there’s a lot of sadness in disasters, it really shines a light on how we come together in times of need, and how so many of us are willing to help without wanting anything in return.

Robinson x 

Dear Robinson,

I had a falling out with my friend, and I just want her back in my life. I don’t think she was totally in the right when we fought, but I also know I didn’t behave great either. I’m willing to forgive and forget but I don’t think she is – how can I convince her to be mates again?

From,
Nigel

Hi there!

Falling out with a friend is never a nice feeling but as humans who feel, it can be inevitable sometimes. After falling out, it can be a confusing thing trying to navigate who reaches out, and understanding where each other are coming from but I think you need to look at what your priority is which seems to me to be that you want her to be back in your life and if her priority is the same, you’ll both want to come to a middle ground to get back to a good place again.

I think a good place to start if you haven’t already is sitting down face to face and allowing each other to explain the way you’ve felt and why you feel this way so you’re on the same page – it’s all about compromise – it can be very easy to get defensive in arguments especially when we can’t see our faults or thinking the other person is in the wrong but it’s knowing where to give and where to take as there are always two sides to every story and to make things work again, I believe it’s important to be aware of each other’s boundaries so you can both avoid conflict the best you can. Hope this helps!

Robinson x 

Got a problem? Send your woes to: dearmetro@bauermedia.co.nz.

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